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Frage:
gesunden zu?  
von Kardeiz (NL), 2013-04-11, 15:20  like dislike  Spam?  
Is this a proper English translation of "Sie (die Tugdenden) gesunden die Verzweiflung zur Demut und den Hochmut zur Begeisterung": "They (the Virtues) heal despair to humility and arrogance to enthusiasm"?. This is the existing translation in the book "The Virtues" by Herbert Witzenmann, but I have my doubts. Who has a better solution?
Antwort: 
Well-founded doubts. To "heal sth. into sth. else" is awkward.  #703256
von MichaelK (US), 2013-04-11, 16:01  like dislike  Spam?  
To retain the idea of gesunden, suggest: They heal despair and arrogance by transforming them into humility and enthusiasm.
Resist the temptation to add "respectively." It's a word much beloved by timid souls who live in fear of making an incorrect reference. The reader will have no problems relating despair to humility and arrogance to enthusiasm. :-)
Antwort: 
The German is very unusual.  #703258
von ddr (AT), 2013-04-11, 16:35  like dislike  Spam?  
Would "transform into a healthy sth." work?
Antwort: 
ddr: yes, it would.  #703260
von MichaelK (US), Last modified: 2013-04-11, 17:22  like dislike  Spam?  
But it does introduce the thought of an unhealthy humility and enthusiasm. To stifle that, you could write "...transform them into the more healthy humility and enthusiasm." But to me, this "more healthy" sounds a bit chatty, like something out of a a popular self-help book. Since the German is high-flown, the "more healthy" would push down the language level a bit.
This just occurred to me: They cure despair and arrogance by turning them into humility and enthusiasm. Uncomplicated and to the point. "Cure" leaves no doubt that despair and arrogance are considered a sickness and that this sickness is being healed (gesundet).
Antwort: 
Doubts confirmed  #703293
von Kardeiz (NL), 2013-04-11, 18:16  like dislike  Spam?  
Thanks, I will use "turning" or "transforming into". In the Germa, it is unusual too, not to say awkward, isn't it?
Antwort: 
Kardeiz: The German is unusual, but I think it's intended to be unusual.  #703309
von MichaelK (US), 2013-04-11, 19:14  like dislike  Spam?  
Which brings up the question: Should the translator clarify? An author who worked hard at inventing words and mysterious phrases would probably be furious if the translator simplified his or her "unusual" text.
Antwort: 
von ddr (AT), 2013-04-11, 19:17  like dislike  Spam?  
 #703310
It's either archaic or very individual usage.
Antwort: 
Michael  #703313
von Kardeiz (NL), 2013-04-11, 19:42  like dislike  Spam?  
I don't think it is a question of clarification but acceptable usage and keeping your reader inside the boat. Problem is that in the analytic English it is much more difficult to create new words than in the more fluent German. The Dutch lies somewhere in between.
Chat:     
Kardeiz: OK, but "acceptable usage" covers a wide span.  #703316
von MichaelK (US), Last modified: 2013-04-11, 20:08  like dislike  Spam?  
Just as a footnote: Sometimes the translation obfuscates. Goethe's wonderfully simple verse containing his invented word Nebelglanz has been translated several times, but never as badly as this:

To the Moon.
Scattered o'er the starry pole
Glimmers Cynthia's beam.
Whispers to the softened soul
Fancy's varied dream.

An den Mond.
Füllest wieder Busch und Thal
Still mit Nebelglanz,
Lösest endlich auch einmal
Meine Seele ganz.
Antwort: 
They (the Virtues) heal despair to become humility and arrogance to become enthusiasm  #703332
von Proteus-, 2013-04-12, 00:18  like dislike  Spam?  178.191.130....
Antwort: 
heal to become  #703359
von Kardeiz (NL), 2013-04-12, 08:35  like dislike  Spam?  
4;Proteus: this is a good find, thanks!
Chat:     
Hmmm.  #703425
von MichaelK (US), Last modified: 2013-04-12, 15:43  like dislike  Spam?  
I find "to heal to sth." and "to heal to become sth." equally awkward. But that's just me. There's nothing grammatically wrong with it.

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